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Films associated with topic raised in Film/Story idea
Time Freeze Shootout (2011) - Short Film
Similarities:
- Superpowers are identical [Time/Movement manipulation]: their stimulation and depressant via the use of words is a main example. [Time/Movement manipulation].
- Their uses share common ground: both use their powers to elude danger, and subsequently for self-defence.
- They feature an intrusion of personal space in some way, shape or form: FreddieW's personal space is invaded by the gunmen, although it is James that's being the invader in another person's space [Lily Taylor]
Differences:
- The conflict in the Time Freeze Shootout is caused by the gunmen, and is simply a conflict FreddieW resolves with the use of his conflict, whilst James Peters and his powers are the architects of the majority of the conflict in his world.
- Character backgrounds are distinctive from one another: FreedieW is simply on a "vacation" (possibly to escape some enemies), however, James is congested with his getting to grips with his powers, impressing his love interest, and overall school life ranging from conflicts with other students to being condemned by teachers.
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Script - First Draft
SCREENPLAY
SCENE 1 - EXT. PARK. DAY
En route to School is JAMES
PETERS casually walks through a park, till he’s stopped by a MAN with a batch
of sweets.
The MAN poses no threat to
JAMES: rather offers him the sweets he’s got in possession, and confides in
JAMES that the sweets are the last of his stock from a sweet-manufacturer that
has collapsed.
MAN
Excuse
me - sorry - I was just wondering if you could take these sweets off me. It’s
the last from a business that’s gone bust
JAMES looks left and right with
apprehension and confusion at the same time, before deciding to take the sweets
from the MAN and thanking him with suspicion
JAMES
Well,
thanks - I guess. Will keep this as a souvenir.
JAMES continues with his
journey to school, still looking puzzled and paying attention to the batch of
sweets given to you, before the MAN replies
MAN
It
could be something more, like - give you powers maybe. You never know what to
expect!
Screen fades to black
Scene 2
INT. School
JAMES enters the school with
batch of sweets slightly intrigued. He discovers that they aren’t as they seem
which later leads him to read the back of the packet that reads “all you have
to say is…FREEZE”. He’s intrigued and decides to use this to his advantage to
have some fun.
Heading to his maths class it
leads up to the following… JAMES enters the classroom with a smirk on his face
anticipating the right time to start his mischief. As the teacher calls out the
register and comes across JAMES’s name he puts his powers to the test.
JAMES
Freeeeeze!
To his
amazement the whole class was motionless, he becomes stunted at the actual fact
the whole class is frozen. He began to have a little more fun at the expense of
his teacher, and leaves the class afterwards with a sense superior.
JAMES
is unaware that the rest of the school is frozen until he arrives in the
corridor and stares through the window to see everyone is motionless. He heads
toward his crushes classroom to try seeking opportunity that he didn’t think
would come about. Then he eats the sweets so that his powers don’t wear out he
then uses it to his advantage to try wins her over through embarrassing her
current boyfriend via another prank. JAMES feels rather pleased with himself as
he leaves the classroom and decides to head home.
SCENE 3
INT Home
As
enters his house he thinks to himself all the things he could do now he has
this special ability which leads him to plot a plan on how to rob the bank.
This leads him to search on YouTube tutorial. As he is inspired by the video it
leaves him to say his thoughts aloud which he ends up saying facing the mirror
which then backfires on himself which permanently freezes himself.
JAMES
I can
have anything I want. Money and power; all I got to do is say freeze.
Moments
later JAMES is carried out of his house in a wheelchair meanwhile this is
happening his little brother sneaks into his room which is where he stumbles
across some left over packets of sweets which were given to JAMES.
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Script - Second Draft
SCREENPLAY
SCENE ONE
EXT. STREET – DAY
En route to school
JAMES PETERS casually walks towards a shop to purchase some sweets but is then
confronted by a man just outside the shop.
Interested in the
sweets JAMES
JAMES PETERS
How much?
(In a deep and crusty voice)
STRANGE MAN
Av’ em fo’ free mate.
(JAMES With a surprised look takes the
sweets)
As puts the sweets
into his bag; he looks for the STRANGE MAN to thank him, but realises he is not
there anymore, Not making much of it, he looks at his watch and realises that
he is getting late for school, and swiftly breaks into a run.
END SCENE.
SCENE TWO
INT.SCHOOL - CANTEEN
- DAY
After JAMES has
finished his lunch, he opens up his bag and pulls out the sweets and eats one. After
he takes a bite of the sweet he feels a sharp cold sensation in which he
reacts.
(Sharply)
JAMES
That’s freezing cold.
As he says that word
the remaining people in, the lunch hall are now frozen still.
JAMES then looks up
and strangely sees that people have now stopped moving he moves over to a
person to inspect what has happened to them constantly poking them.
(Confused)
JAMES
Hello… Mate? (Poking them as he does so)
He then looks at the
sweet wrapper for what may have caused the place to freeze, to find that there
are instructions on the wrapper, that ‘all you have to say is freeze’ followed
by a much smaller print that say unfreeze.
(Following the instructions)
JAMES
UNFREEZE! (Loudly)
As he says Unfreeze, everybody starts to
continue again.
(The person he was next to poking)
STUDENT ONE
Are you okay there buddy?
(JAMES Smirks)
JAMES
FREEZE
UNFREEZE
FREEZE
UNFREEZE
FREEZE
UNFREEZE
FREEZE
He continuously says
Freeze and unfreeze to stop and reanimate people.
He is finding the
newly found powers humorous he then decides to play a prank on STUDENT ONE so
he ties his shoelaces together and then puts his face very close to the plate
that he is eating from.
(Then comically laughs)
JAMES
UNFREEZE
The plan then goes
in his favour as STUDENT ONE’S face falls onto his plate and is completely
covered in food, he tries to find a cloth but also falls over from the fact
that his shoelaces are tied
(Laughing)
JAMES
I LOVE THESE POWERS!
END SCENE.
MONTAGE SCENE
FIRST CLIP
INT. SCHOOL - CLASS
– DAY
In class, Teacher
sends out James for not paying attention.
(In frustration JAMES decides to get the
teachers Apple and gets it dirty before handing it back to him)
SECOND CLIP
EXT. SCHOOL -
PLAYGROUND – DAY
JAMES gets into a
situation with a bully, as he had thrown a ball at him by accident, he quickly
evades the situation by using his abilities.
THIRD CLIP
INT. SCHOOL – CLASS
JAMES is bored in
class, and as the Bell is about to ring, He ties everyone’s shoelaces together
just before they leave.
END MONTAGE SCENE.
SCENE FOUR
INT. SCHOOL – HALLWAY
– DAY
JAMES is now trying
to talk to a girl that he likes.
JAMES
Hey
LILY
He-
JACK
-GET AWAY FROM HER FREAK
JAMES, rather
frustrated with JACK trying to stop him from talking to the girl he likes,
freezes him and continuously hits him in the groin
JACK then reanimates
and feels a very strong pain in which he is kneels over and grabs his crotch
JACK
Owwwwwwwwwwwww!
LILY
Oh my god, are you okay babe?
JAMES who is now
devastated as he has now puzzled together the fact that Lily has a boyfriend is
heart-broken.
He stands there as
everything has gone mute to him and the sound of the bell sees everyone out.
He is then making
his slow way home.
END SCENE
SCENE FIVE
INT. HOUSE – Night
Weeks later after
JAMES comes home, sits down to watch TV, He notices that on TV, there has been
a robbery and the people involved have been apprehended.
(He then stands up holding the sweet packets
in his hand)
JAMES
I can have anything I want, why didn’t I
think of this before; I have the power!
ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS FREEZE.
As he says the words
‘freeze’, he has turned to the mirror and frozen himself.
Sometime later he is
discovered, and as he is being taken away the sweet packet has fallen from his
grasp into another person later on.
SCENE END
Our original script wasn't deemed to be an actual script, but rather another treatment: with considerably large paragraphs describing what is said or done by the characters, as one of the main issues, another was quotes from characters in the paragraph, instead of having a a line of space and then inserting the character's name and their line of dialogue. So, like our very first treatment, our script underwent some significant revamp: ranging from the font size and type, to the amount of dialogue (along with dialogue from other characters such as Lily and Jack)included, as well as the inclusion of a montage scene covering the various mischievous actions from James with the use of his powers. There's a bit more to the character arc also: for example, James is saddened when he puts two and two together and realises that the boy he was constantly hitting in the groin was Lily's boyfriend, illustrating his reaction to failing to achieve a goal, and how much his crush means to him, his sadness can perhaps be said to dilute the conflict temporarily, until the twist, which is once again caused by the depth of James' powers.
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Q&A/Interview With Main Character
Q&A With James Peters
Q: When were you happiest?
James Peters: When I am messing with people
Q: What is your earliest memory?
JP: Before we turned rich.
Q: Which living person do you most admire and why?
JP: Jack Vale, the master behind the funniest pranks I have ever seen.
Q: What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
JP: I hate that I need people.
Q: What was your most embarrassing moment?
JP: Getting rejected by the girl I like.
Q: Property aside, what's the most expensive thing you've bought?
JP: A double-glazed window to replace the window that I smashed when trying one of the pranks inspired by Vale
Q: What is your most treasured possession?
JP: Treasure? What type of treasure?
Q: What would your super power be?
JP: What super powers? What do you mean?
Q: What makes you unhappy?
JP: Me being alone and seeing my crush with somebody else.
Q: What is your most unappealing habit?
JP: I take things too far… sometimes.
Q: What is your favorite smell?
JP: Flowers for my crush.
Q: What is your favorite word?
JP: LOL
Q: What is your favorite book?
JP: Villain.net by Andy Briggs
Q: What is your guiltiest pleasure?
JP: Eating lots of sweets
Q: To whom would you most like to say sorry and why?
JP: Myself, I am never good enough.
Q: What or who is the greatest love of your life?
JP: Lily Taylor, my crush.
Q: What does love feel like?
JP: Whatever it takes for me being with her.
Q: What was the best kiss of your life?
JP: Kissing practice on my Teddy
Q: What is the worst thing you've ever done?
A: I beat someone up; he didn’t even fight back even though he was bigger than me… it’s like he couldn’t even move.
Q: If you could edit your past, what would you change?
JP: My Life as a whole.
Q: What is the closest you've come to death?
JP: Frozen for ever, like I’m trapped by my own evil doings.
Q: What do you consider your greatest achievement?
JP: My funny pranks
Q: What keeps you awake at night?
JP: Her.
Q: How would you like to be remembered?
JP: As a Somebody.
Q: What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
JP: With great power, comes great responsibility.
Personality Traits
·
Self-centred
·
Bemoaning/Stuck in the past
·
Careless
·
Wayward
·
Quiet
·
Secretive/Reserved (Obviously!)
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Group Treatment - Third Draft Version 2
Explanation for changes: The majority of the plot, context and themes of the story is very much still present, however the rock being the special object in possession of James, is replace by a batch of sweets, as well as the origins of the special object being given more plausbility and realism in terms of the object's popularity amongst those from James' age group or an age group slightly, so in other words, teenagers and children are more likely to be seen with sweets than a rock that is one of many rocks in different shapes and sizes, mainly due to use.
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Group Treatment - Third Draft
Explanation for changes: This third draft provides more insight into what happens in the conflict, with James opting to immorally use his powers, this draft is even more character-arc friendly by a slight amount, because James is doing more mischief with the super-powers than in the second draft, and the mischief is directly linked to other students, again expanding on James' background and the influence it's had on him as a person: someone who may have been full of venegence and anger, but before had managed to retain those negative feelings within him, as maybe he felt a sense of vulnerability to the aforementioned students.
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Group Treatment - Second Draft
Explanation for changes: The story idea, and consequently the treatment for the story, had a complete overhaul due to the need of a genuine conflict that involved two contrasting forces colliding and disrupting the main character. Iain If anything, in the original idea, it featured two solitary forces coming together to ultimately create the setup that was present from the beginning, this is coupled with whatever danger faced by Iain, which was the upcoming traffic in front of him, was always going to diminish even without the intervention of the woman. What the original idea also lacked was a firm character arc: how a character grows and develops as the story progresses, there were no scenarios where main characters tackled certain challenges correctly or incorrectly, there's very little reflection, if any at all, from the characters' perspectives on their behaviour and attitudes towards events that occur. With the other story idea, the main character James Peters is morally challenged by the extent of his super-powers, and the challenge features the responsibility throw to James to do good or bad, the conflict is himself and the morals he has, which then go on to partly forming a character background.
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